Northlander's Helm

[berelinde]

#2

[EiriktheScald]

Set #1 looks brilliant and uncomfortable to wear at the same time. The 'ears' look neater, too.

I may have used unsharp mask on #1. It does look a tad more brilliant, but they both came from the same "template."

[EiriktheScald]

Next is Eirik's broadsword, Skyld, which is a play on words (the OW. Norse adjective skyldr "responsible, under an obligation, owing").

 

Inventory BAMs:

 

Description BAM:

[Miloch]

I like this one better (). Hmm, what to do with it now...

[Domi]

I like the second one on the basis of comfort. But it all sure looks glamorous!

[Guest erik]

(Helmet? #2. Very nice work. Both the helmet and the sword.)

 

Interesting choice of word. In modern Norwegian, "Skyld" refers to debts owed, wrongs made, even guilt. "It's your fault!" => "Det er din skyld!"

 

In Old Norse, the spelling was slightly different: Skuld - and it also was the name of one of the Fates, a Norn. A sword certainly can determine the fate of others... but naming a sword thus? Cheeky, perhaps asking for a god to take notice

 

On the other hand, having looked it up, the Old Norse adjective skyldr more properly refers to "of the same clan/family" / "related by blood/marriage"; figuratively "having properties in common". Still a valid but little-used adjective in Norwegian, less the 'r'. So now it is spelled the same as the other word with a rather different meaning.

 

(Don't mind my lecturing, please. Tell me to shut up if I get boring )

[EiriktheScald]

(Don't mind my lecturing, please. Tell me to shut up if I get boring )

No, I appreciate that. I do not speak Norwegian, thus relying on reference material and advice such as yours. The first use of this word is what I had in mind, which seemed appropriate to the storyline and, as you say, cheeky.

 

I thought the blade looked a bit too wide on the inventory icons, especially on the smaller version. Here's a tweaked version:

 

 

I like this one better (). Hmm, what to do with it now...

Well, I admit that sword has more enhancements. But I've changed directions so often, with every aspect of this project, its almost like nothing is sacred!

[Miloch]

I thought the blade looked a bit too wide on the inventory icons, especially on the smaller version. Here's a tweaked version:

The first one looked a bit... I dunno, sharper? The only thing I noticed was you might want to lighten up the right side of the crossguard, otherwise it kind of vanishes into the background.

 

More nitpicks:

exquisit > exquisite

 

It bears the seal of the High King of the southern "Celtic" part of the islands, yet it's a Northlander sword? It's possible, I guess...

[EiriktheScald]

I thought the blade looked a bit too wide on the inventory icons, especially on the smaller version. Here's a tweaked version:

The first one looked a bit... I dunno, sharper? The only thing I noticed was you might want to lighten up the right side of the crossguard, otherwise it kind of vanishes into the background.

I did lighten it, but went less sharp; as it appeared to stand out from the Bioware standard issue.

 

More nitpicks:

exquisit > exquisite

Noted.

 

It bears the seal of the High King of the southern "Celtic" part of the islands, yet it's a Northlander sword? It's possible, I guess...

Who said it was? Hopefully all will make sense when you read future drafts.

[Miloch]

Who said it was?

You did. Ok, maybe I didn't actually *read* the description at first, and this is noted by:

wide spread > widespread

 

And that first sentence seems kind of run-on-ish to me, but I don't have a quick fix for it, other than to resort to my usual butchery of cutting it into multiple sentences (and yes, this is kind of a run on sentence in itself ).

[EiriktheScald]

Okay, I lightened them as far as I care too...

 

 

... and corrected the text

 

[Kitana]

Looks really nice- the helmet and sword both, wow.

 

The one thing that sounds a bit off, please correct me if I'm wrong:

 

This

 

While the pattern of hilt and blade design might readily be called 'The Northlander sword' to do so would be to neglect

 

should be

 

While the pattern of hilt and blade design might readily be called 'The Northlander sword', to do so would be to neglect

 

that, right?

[Miloch]

Well, I didn't want to nitpick this further, but I'd probably do it as:

While the pattern of hilt and blade design might readily be called "the Northlander sword," to do so would be to neglect

Single quotes are used only inside double quotes (it's the reverse in European rules but the game follows U.S. conventions usually) and punctuation always goes inside quotes. If you want to be bored out of your mind, we have about 11 pages on this kind of stuff in the Fixpack workroom.

 

And if I'm going to get even more heavy-handed with the editing:

While the design of both hilt and blade seem to typify "the Northlander sword," to call it such would be to neglect

(To avoid passive voice, redunancy of pattern/design, etc.)