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The King and I

Culain Mainframe

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All right, here comes the drool.


The signing was taking place in one of the bookstores downtown Calgary in a large cafee they have upstairs there. It was cozy, but unlike Toronto, nobody had to be packed in the rows between the bookshelves.


George Martin gave an hour or hour and a half talk, answered some questions from the audience, and then signed our precious books!




The most important thing first: Martin was touring since October, so he had not done much progress on the Dance With the Dragons. However, he is sitting on 500-600 pages taken out of the Feats, and (well, last time he was three years late) he wants to try to finish by the summer, so that the book can be published in the end of 2006. Or the beginning of 2007… Well, the main thing, he said, do not believe anything amazon tells you! On the daily updates: It would give people heart-attacks to read that he ripped apart twelve pages, so he is a week back on what had been written.


Alright, now to the rest of the stuff: he started with saying that he is disappointed in Calgary – last time he was touring, it was with the Storm of Swords, and we had –40 C, so it greatly helped him in the writing about the Wall. Yes! We, calgarians, sure did our best there!


Then he went on remembering his very first signing tour that started in Texas – a mistake right there – where he had 20 or so people in Houston, 30 in Austin, and then, when he came to Dallas, why, there was a good crowd… for the signings done by a dog – some sort of a children character, I suppose, a big stuffed toy costume and all that. He had two people. J


Then he started talking about the questions he is usually asked to get it out of the way. In regards to the advice for the inspiring writers were: don’t start with the epic, write short stories with the beginning, middle and end, and experiment with them; learn write about the painful things; read a lot, and of every gender and persist.


Killing characters: He writes the books that he wants to read. Meaning, the books that you know how they’ll end on page 5 (told a joke about his mother who could predict very well how the next episode of I love Lucy will end in the very beginning, and how he got good at it soon too, and got bored). And the books that allow emotional attachment to the characters.


Ideally, Martin said, I want you to drop through the book cover and be in the middle of the book, on the battlefield when the characters are fighting, or in the bedroom when they step there. Obviously, it’s not what’s going to happen, because you will still be sitting in your chair or in your bathtub – bad idea, the books are too heavy, and you will drop them. But, the magic is to make it real.


Well, if you are polite, you will call it a work of a magician, and if you are impolite – a fraud. (He likes this idea, actually; on the prior conference, he opened his “Why do we like to read GoH’s speech with the “I am a liar.â€Â


Here, he also gave a lovely a little speech on gratuitous; people often ask why there are so much gratuitous in his books – gratuitous heraldry, gratuitous feasting, gratuitous sex. Not many, he said, object to the gratuitous feasting though… What, would he ask do you call gratuitous? Well, they’d say, when it does not advance the plot. Martin’s reply is that he can hand out the 20 page summaries of the plot, but he does not believe that it what the readers want; it’s not what he wants in a book – he’d read plenty which were just that: plot advancement. He want the reader to get hungry when the characters feast, and horny when they make love… or disgusted, as the case might be. Fear. He was talking about the rollercoaster movies and books – comparing the adrenaline rush you get while perfectly safe and the “real†fear, the one that one experiences in the face of death. Talked about us watching Indiana Jones killing 424 Nazis, and knowing that not a single one is going to blow the back of Indi’s head of….


While in his universe, Westeros, the world is dangerous, so if Tyrion faces 424 Nazis he is in real trouble – first, because there are no Nazis in westerous, and second, because he is a dwarf, so facing two, or even just one guy with a big axe is a challenge for him, and who knows if he emerges alive. That’s by the way, why he kills the characters – do it early on, and you achieve the suspense. The reader should not know what happens next, he needs to want to see what happens next.


But, he hates killing his characters. If you thought it was painfull for you to read the Red Wedding, maybe you hurled the book into the wall, well, it was more painful for him to read. The Red Wedding was the last scene written, before he had to submit the manuscript to the publisher.


Questions from the audience:


On keeping notes and writing the backstory: No, Martin does not keep outlines (did it in his TV’s days and hated it). he knows where he is going, but he puts everything he has pretty much in the books. Said, he gets e-mails sometimes from Tolkien devotees, asking him about the structure and grammar of Old Valyrian. Said: “I created eight words in High Valyrian. When I need the ninth I will create it.†of course, he said, most authors like to pretend that they are Tolkines, keeping manuscripts and manuscripts of the world creation. But, it’s not the case. Tolkien is an exception. It is not like an iceberg. It is more like a float onto which the writer piled a bit of ice. When he needs the iceberg to look taller, well, he’d add more ice.


That answers the question that is asked of him: “What if you die before finishing the books?â€Â


Well, I don’t want some f*cking hack to finish my book! You will have to hope that I live long enough.


Now, how does he keep track of all those characters? A gift, he guesses. He is bad in the real life with remembering people; he won’t remember the guys who stand in line twice to sign more copies (he signs three per person per time); but he happens to remember the name of the captain of the guard in the Highgarden

Speaking of the names, someone asked about the names. Different ways, some invented, some altered. He praised Tolkien, who does not just have one wonderful name, but six of them; also mentioned Vance in that respect.


He said it still amazes him that people call their babies after their characters, but he is slightly apprehensive as well. In the “Beauty and the Beast†days, when one of the cast, called Catherine resigned, they killed her, and introduced a new character. So, one of the outraged phone calls was from a tearful, weeping woman, telling the writers that they killed her baby, because she named it after the character J He said, be careful, you like the character now, but what about in three books? (Domi: conclusion: name children after the dead characters)


He was also asked about how his book started. Pretty much with Bran’s chapter. The Wall is inspired by his visit to the Hadrian’s wall, but since his was bigger, it had to guard the realm against someone fiercer than Scotts (not that Scotts aren’t fierce).




So, in the end, I happily got my autograph; I asked him to write “Don’t cry when Jaime dies.†but he laughed and said “it will be giving too much away†and signed: “Don’t cry when _________________ dies†He left a hellishly long line there too, to fill in!


Hey, did I bore you all to death yet?



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Very interesting relation.

I must get some of his books :D .


So, in the end, I happily got my autograph; I asked him to write “Don’t cry when Jaime dies.†but he laughed and said “it will be giving too much away†and signed: “Don’t cry when _________________ dies†He left a hellishly long line there too, to fill in!


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Wow, that was really fantastic, nice bits of information also. So I guess you have now fulfilled one of your greatest wishes, meeting the King?


I live in Holland, so there isn't much change he comes here for a book tour. But nice to see one such meeting. :D


I will wait for the paperback version of Feast, I hope when I finally will read it, a Dance of Dragons is also out, I will disappear from the earth when that time comes :D

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I will wait for the paperback version of Feast, I hope when I finally will read it, a Dance of Dragons is also out, I will disappear from the earth when that time comes


I am actually quite relaxed about the Dance. The only character I really can't wait to see there is Jon :D



George Martin? Who he?


Yay, another potential convert! Martin is a wonderful, magnificent, great author! A Song of Ice and Fire is the best fantasy series ever started - we don't know yet how they finish, but so far it had been in an entirely different ligue than the rest of the fantasy literature. So, if you have not read it yet, get A Game of Thrones immidiately! :D

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Yeah, I do not think I liked P&P D&D all that much. It is sort of nice, and the group here is great, but I honestly prefer CRPG, because it is more immersive, and requires much, much, much less memorization of the rules and allows you to enjoy the actions, taking care of the boring stuff like inventories, money management, dice rolling, bonuses etc. :D

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