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  1. Fun little snippets that can only be gathered if you do silly things in-game - the Easter egg is as old as computer gaming itself. One more recent addition to Easter eggs in games are conditional talks that can be triggered if you do something that is really a sideline in the game. In BG2, you can drink, and get intoxicated. The only thing this does is reduce your combat stats for a time, as a single drink or two is more than enough to get rumors at bars, is really not necessary, and as far as I know has no relation to anything at all in the gameplay. Several modders have played with this intoxication, though, using it for entertainment, and Aran seems to be a bar-hopping type of guy. Fortunately or unfortunately, I am not, preferring a quiet, reasonably aged scotch in the company of friends and/or family over wild shenannigans. (Yep. I actually used 'shennanigans' in a sentence. +10 points for SAT prep tests). So, aside from the scripting of the trigger (CheckStat:intoxication), here is a first pass at a series of three 'drunk talks', and a call for ideas to add/take away. The goal is for short, humorous, interesting exchanges that would happen when Three Sheets To The Wind™, Blotto™, or just short of Praying to the Great Porcelain God®. We have plenty of other spots for deep introspection, fun flirts, or other silliness. Here, the player will need to get Aran drunk in order to trigger this set, so we can assume that the player is purposefully searching for a fun relief from the 400th playthrough of required quest cycle, and wants a bit of humor to spice up the game. /* This is fun - Let's paint the town red! */ IF ~Global("c-arandrunk","GLOBAL",1)~ THEN BEGIN c-arandrunk1 SAY ~[ARAN] Now, tha... that last round, it packed one hell o' a... hell o' a wallop. Hey, stop weavin' about so much, <CHARNAME>.~ + ~Gender(Player1,FEMALE)~ + ~[PC] You seem to have had too much to drink. Perhaps we should get you to bed.~ DO ~SetGlobal("c-arandrunk","GLOBAL",2) SetGlobalTimer("c-aransmalltalk","GLOBAL",300)~ c-drunk1fem + ~Gender(Player1,MALE)~ + ~[PC] You seem to have had too much to drink. Perhaps we should get you to bed.~ DO ~SetGlobal("c-arandrunk","GLOBAL",2) SetGlobalTimer("c-aransmalltalk","GLOBAL",300)~ c-drunk1male END /* womenfolk */ IF ~~ c-drunk1fem SAY ~[ARAN] Too kind o' you, lookin' out for me an' all. But I think you'd be a mite bit disappointed in my performance, eh? On account o' I might not be able to see where to fit th' key in the hole wi' everythin' spinnin' around so much, so to speak.~ ++ ~[PC] Is everything you say and do about sex?~ + c-aboutsex ++ ~[PC] Did you just proposition me?~ + c-proposition ++ ~[PC] I wasn't expecting much from you anyways. Forget it.~ + c-million ++ ~[PC] You would never say that to me if you were not very, very drunk.~ + c-verydrunk END IF ~~ c-aboutsex SAY ~[ARAN] Hells, yes. Well, no. I mean, there be fightin', an' writin', an' sometimes a nice bit o' commentary on th' state o' Waterdeep politics. But mostly, it be about sex. Either havin' it, not havin' it, or whom th' havin' or not havin'... what was I sayin'?~ ++ ~[PC] You were saying how you really wanted to go to sleep right now.~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT ++ ~[PC] You are stupid and rude, and I think you can just stay here and fend for yourself.~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT ++ ~[PC] You are drunk. I think I might be, too, a little. I will see you tomorrow.~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT ++ ~[PC] Politics, sex, having your way with me, you know... the usual. Aran? Are you awake? Aran?~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT END IF ~~ c-proposition SAY ~[ARAN] Did I? I do believe I did. Well, if I could remember what I said. Why, you interested?~ ++ ~[PC] You are stupid and rude, and I think you can just stay here and fend for yourself.~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT ++ ~[PC] You are drunk. I think I might be, too, a little. I will see you tomorrow.~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT ++ ~[PC] Yes.~ + c-dammit ++ ~[PC] Never in a million years.~ + c-million ++ ~[PC] This is why I do not get drunk. It saves all sorts of embarassment the next morning.~ + c-million END IF ~~ c-verydrunk SAY ~[ARAN] You be right on that. But probably I won't remember in th' mornin'. I don't know, <CHARNAME>... there be so much about you that sets me on fire. But then you scare me, too. Don't know if I am comin' or goin', goin', or... what was I sayin'?~ ++ ~[PC] You are stupid and rude, and I think you can just stay here and fend for yourself.~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT ++ ~[PC] You are drunk. I think I might be, too, a little. I will see you tomorrow.~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT ++ ~[PC] I would not sleep with you, Aran, even if you were a Masked Lord of Neverwinter. Never in a million years.~ + c-million ++ ~[PC] This is why I do not get drunk. It saves all sorts of embarassment the next morning.~ + c-million ++ ~[PC] Well, you are drunk, and I might be, too... but I want to be special to someone right now. I say yes. Let's go upstairs.~ + c-dammit END IF ~~ c-dammit SAY ~[ARAN] Shun's... Zune's.. hells, whatever-her-name-is' Schlippery Schlopes. I want you, an' you say yes, an' then it all falls apart on account o' I am just about to...~ ++ ~[PC] Aran? Aran? Wake up, Aran...~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT END IF ~~ c-million SAY ~[ARAN] Well, good thing I got a tough hide, eh? Used to rejection. Now, that there cute little thing over there, she might just say yes. Her... th' one standin' next to her twin...~ ++ ~[PC] Aran, you are pointing vaguely in the direction of a table. I think you... too late. Bartender, can you get someone to haul him up to his room?~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT END /* menfolk */ IF ~~ c-drunk1male SAY ~[ARAN] No, naught o' talk like that! We got th' whole rest o' th'... ok, we got mayhap a few hours, but still, we should get out there an' find us somethin' to do! There be a lot o' women attracted to power, boyo. Some o' it might rub off on me.~ ++ ~[PC] I am spoken for. But you go along and find some poor girl to make wish that she had stayed home tonight. Just don't get arrested.~ + c-spoilsport ++ ~[PC] I am spoken for. But a fling might be just the thing. She has been getting very possessive and controlling lately. We are not married.~ + c-controlling ++ ~[PC] Come on, let's find some women who have loose morals and low standards. That should take care of you, and then I will go find someone with class and refined tastes for myself.~ + c-bigtalk ++ ~[PC] Is everything you say and do about sex?~ + c-allaboutsex END IF ~~ c-allaboutsex SAY ~[ARAN] Hells, yes. Well, no. I mean, there be fightin', an' writin', an' sometimes a nice bit o' commentary on th' state o' Waterdeep politics. But mostly, it be about sex. Either havin' it, not havin' it, or whom th' havin' or not havin'... what was I sayin'?~ + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were babbling randomly again. I lost track somewhere about the time you opened your mouth.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were babbling randomly again. I lost track somewhere about the time you opened your mouth.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] You were babbling randomly again. I lost track somewhere about the time you opened your mouth.~ + c-evilfriend + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] Do not worry, Aran. we will get you upstairs and keep you out of trouble. In this condition, I do not think you even know what you are saying.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] Well, this is amusing. You are drunk, boyo.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] Hey, I think you should get a few more drinks in you, while I bet on how many it takes to make you pass out.~ + c-evilfriend ++ ~[PC] Come on, let's find some women who have loose morals and low standards. That should take care of you, and then I will go find someone with class and refined tastes for myself.~ + c-bigtalk ++ ~[PC] Hey, Aran.. say this... 'she sells sea shells by the seashore'. Come on, I dare you!~ + c-sheshellsh END IF ~~ c-bigtalk SAY ~[ARAN] Oh, big talk, big talk. I can see 'em linin' up for you, right now, eh? Price o' fame, I guess. So many women, so many beautiful women... Waukeen's Wanderin' Worshipers, what in th' nine hells was I sayin'?~ ++ ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to buy another round.~ + c-nocoin + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to try to bed that waitress over there.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to try to bed that waitress over there.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to try to bed that waitress over there.~ + c-evilfriend + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to bed to sleep off the drink.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to bed to sleep off the drink.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to bed to sleep off the drink.~ + c-evilfriend + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that the night is young, and you wanted to have some fun.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that the night is young, and you wanted to have some fun.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that the night is young, and you wanted to have some fun.~ + c-evilfriend END IF ~~ c-spoilsport SAY ~[ARAN] Spoilsport. You should come wi' me, an' help me land one o' these women in my bedroll, eh? So many women, so many beautiful women... Waukeen's Wanderin' Worshipers, what in th' nine hells was I sayin'?~ ++ ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to buy another round.~ + c-nocoin + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to try to bed that waitress over there.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to try to bed that waitress over there.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to try to bed that waitress over there.~ + c-evilfriend + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to bed to sleep off the drink.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to bed to sleep off the drink.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to bed to sleep off the drink.~ + c-evilfriend + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that the night is young, and you wanted to have some fun.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that the night is young, and you wanted to have some fun.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that the night is young, and you wanted to have some fun.~ + c-evilfriend END IF ~~ c-controlling SAY ~[ARAN] Exactly my point. Women, they need to know they be not th' only choice out there. Keep em' on their toes, I always say. But I say a bit more'n I should, an' naught comes o' it, either. I think. Do I think? I was thinkin' o' somethin. So many women, so many beautiful women... Waukeen's Wanderin' Worshipers, what in th' nine hells was I sayin'?~ ++ ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to buy another round.~ + c-nocoin + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to try to bed that waitress over there.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to try to bed that waitress over there.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to try to bed that waitress over there.~ + c-evilfriend + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to bed to sleep off the drink.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to bed to sleep off the drink.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that you were going to bed to sleep off the drink.~ + c-evilfriend + ~ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that the night is young, and you wanted to have some fun.~ + c-goodfriend + ~ReputationLT() ReputationGT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that the night is young, and you wanted to have some fun.~ + c-neutralfriend + ~ReputationLT()~ + ~[PC] You were saying that the night is young, and you wanted to have some fun.~ + c-evilfriend END IF ~~ c-goodfriend SAY ~[ARAN] You be a damned good fr... friend, <CHARNAME>. Deneir's Sharp Quill, it were a g... good day when I signed on wi' you. Prince among swine, or men, or someth'n like that, an' all... a Mystra-Kissed Hero o' th' Realms.~ ++ ~[PC] Easy, easy... you are starting to wobble. Stay seated...~ + c-passout ++ ~[PC] Careful. I have had a few too many drinks myself, but your breath smells like you have been drinking D'Tranion.~ + c-passout ++ ~[PC] Another reason not to drink. Whether I am available or not, I am about to be the only one of the two of us who could do anything but slobber and pass out.~ + c-passout END IF ~~ c-neutralfriend SAY ~[ARAN] You be a damned good fr... friend, <CHARNAME>. Well, no, that be wrong. You be a tough man what to understand. Hoar's Swift Justice, you go one way an' then th' next, semmin' to stay neutral, you kn... know. Hey. Stop spinnin' aout like that.~ ++ ~[PC] I am not spinning, Aran. But here, you might want to keep a bucket handy...~ + c-passout ++ ~[PC] Careful. I have had a few too many drinks myself, but your breath smells like you have been drinking D'Tranion.~ + c-passout ++ ~[PC] Another reason not to drink. Whether I am available or not, I am about to be the only one of the two of us who could do anything but slobber and pass out.~ + c-passout END IF ~~ c-evilfriend SAY ~[ARAN] You be a damned good fr... friend, <CHARNAME>. Umberlee's Undulations, that be wrong. You be th' meanest, nastiest Son' o' Bhaal ever let loose on' th' face o' Toril. But I got your back, an' I c... can't rightly complain. I like to be on th' winnin' side, eh? Bastard.~ ++ ~[PC] Interesting revelation. You love me, but you hate me. Useful.~ + c-passout ++ ~[PC] Hey, you should go run your head through that door over there. You could do it. 5 gold says you can do it...~ + c-passout ++ ~[PC] Bartender, my friend here says that I am on his tab for the night. Get me your best drink!~ + c-passout ++ ~[PC] You. Yeah, the ugly one. My friend Aran here says your girlfriend looks like a cow. And something about your mother being an orc.~ + c-passout END IF ~~ c-sheshellsh SAY ~[ARAN] She shellsh... See sell... she sh... Red Knight's Rump, I be shpittin... Hells. You say it. I be lookin' for someplace where to lie down. Nice table... ~ IF ~~ THEN GOTO c-passout END IF ~~ c-nocoin SAY ~[ARAN] Right, by Oghma's Oracular Aura! Ano... 'nother round! Only I can't bloody well find my coinpurse, eh? I th... think it fell somehweres down here. Nice table... it be a bit smelly down here under t, but th' floor feels right s... soft it do.~ IF ~~ THEN GOTO c-passout END IF ~~ c-passout SAY ~[ARAN] Shun's... Zune's.. hells, whatever-her-name-is' Schlippery Schlopes.~ ++ ~[PC] Aran? Aran? Wake up, Aran...~ DO ~RestParty()~ EXIT END /* DT2: Hey, those skirts are short - cool. */ IF ~Global("c-arandrunk","GLOBAL",3)~ THEN BEGIN c-arandrunk2 SAY ~[ARAN] Sharess' Sensual Caress, I do love th' Waterdeep fashions. Low bodice, high skirt, just flirty enough to drive a man crazy. A toast to Waterdeep, an' a hope that next year be th' year o' th' invisible dress!~ + ~Gender(Player1,FEMALE)~ + ~[PC] I think you need to slow down. Do you remember what happened last time you had too much to drink?~ DO ~SetGlobal("c-arandrunk","GLOBAL",4) SetGlobalTimer("c-aransmalltalk","GLOBAL",300)~ + c-noidontfemale + ~Gender(Player1,MALE)~ + ~[PC] I think you need to slow down. Do you remember what happened last time you had too much to drink?~ DO ~SetGlobal("c-arandrunk","GLOBAL",4) SetGlobalTimer("c-aransmalltalk","GLOBAL",300)~ + c-noidontmale END /* DT3: We have to stop doing this. Where's the FR AA Chapter? */ IF ~Global("c-arandrunk","GLOBAL",5)~ THEN BEGIN c-arandrunk3 SAY ~[ARAN] ~ ++ ~[PC] ~ DO ~SetGlobal("c-arandrunk","GLOBAL",6) SetGlobalTimer("c-aransmalltalk","GLOBAL",300)~ EXIT END
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