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'Fresh' Banter Preview: Edwin

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With many thanks to Merja and Laura for edwinizing and editing:


Edwin (At Rest, Random)


E: What is this stench? What is this...substance you are brewing, in complete disregard for my rest? Did you finally decide to replace the rotten mash in your head that <CHARNAME>, in a fit of unsightly altruism has taken for a sentient creature's brain, with something not quite so disgusting?

K: This is glue, Edwin, made of fish bones and resin. I need to fletch some arrows.

E: I see. One should expect, I suppose, that when people of inferior capabilities attempt to replicate the most meager of spells, such as magic missiles, they end up producing nothing but a miasma.

Kivan: A spell could only be used once or thrice a day, while my arrows have no such limitation.

E: Have not we bought enough of this feathered kindling to plant a small field with them already? (Now, I will not be surprised if he actually did plant them in hopes of harvest. These nature types are exhaustingly incompetent in their naiveté).

K: I trust my own workmanship best.

E: Oh? How queer. But perhaps if I had to depend on such imperfect weaponry instead of my mighty spell craft I would do the same. Luckily, my powers are great indeed and I do not have to lower myself to peasants’ handiwork (or should I call it folk-art?)

K: Peasants’?

E: Judging by its stench. Plebes ever gravitate toward the occupations that have maximum potential to sustain the emission of foul aromas. The more widespread a miasma is, the more content they appear with the results of their daily labors. As do you, apparently. Away with you! (Edwin presses a perfumed handkerchief to his nose)

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Jaheira (after meeting SHadow Druids in the Grove):


K: Shadow Druids? Stay close, Jaheira. I remember that their kin in Cloakwood were ready to kill you on sight.

J: Worry not, ranger. I would like nothing more than to beat some sense into these stubborn heads.

K: I expect no less from you, Jaheira. You are unbiased even to those who share your beliefs.

J: The shadow filth claim to share the druid's beliefs, yet they cause more damage with their extreme tactics than they solve. Irreparable damage at that.

K: I am appalled by their enslavement of animals to slay the people of Trademeet.

J: This is but one example of their hypocrisy! One cannot preserve balance by exterminating a large part of it.

K: There is a faction among my people that stands for restoring elven supremacy in the world...by whatever means it takes. When I look at the state of my kin and see its inevitable demiseâ€â€

J: Kivan, you're sounding like that Evereskian, Xan. This is unhealthy.

K: There is a reason for his melancholic demeanor, Jaheira.

I admit that a part of me commiserates with the extremists. Part of me greatly desires my people restored to their former glory and lands. But would one defy history itself? No matter how I cast it, it seems that a war against N'Tel'Quess will only hasten the decline of the elves.

J: And you are right; there is a difference between wishful thinking and realistic plans. To destroy and kill in the name of something that cannot be is criminal. But we have tarried long enough. It's time to confront the shadow kin.

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